W A R R I O R S

Wingman Wednesday’s: WARRIORS

By now, the weekend is on the horizon and we can all feel that internal pull to have sexy and exciting plans. Maybe we have some, maybe only our bestie has some, but either way the weekend is when we all come out to play and by Wednesday we’re getting excited for what’s to come.

So, what makes for an exciting weekend? What makes Sunday a success, where we can sit back with our morning coffee and a permanent smile saying, ahh, what a glorious life I live?

Sex. That’s right, sex. Nothing makes the weekend feel like more of a masterful success than a great round (or 5) of sex with someone that excites us!

Think I’m lying? Ask yourself the last time you had a weekend you deemed a massive success. Did you have great sex? Was there a guy involved? Did you meet someone new, or hope to? Did you make good money that you’re excited to spend on that new pair of shoes or Fenty’s Gloss Bomb?

Sometimes, it feels like sex is the last thing on our minds, but when we really dig out all the worry and insecurity we see clearly that our sexuality lies at the root of all our actions, the sole motivator of our daily lives.

Don’t get me wrong, there will always be exceptions. Sex isn’t the only thing that excites us and certainly not the only thing that we value. But, for the most part, it’s at the forefront of all our greatest motives and an underlying current for all the rest.

So how can you ensure you’ll have a successful weekend and spend your Sunday relaxing and fantasizing about all the greatest moments?

Find yourself the perfect wingman.

A wingman can be your bestie that’s going to show up for you and stay by your side while you muse and mingle the night away, but a wingman can also be your waxer, your aesthetician, your hair stylist, your personal shopper, the girl at shoppers who always hooks you up with the best sales. Sometimes, the people who come through for you and help you have great sex are a little more subtle, and it’s important to take notice and appreciate these people for what they are. They’re your wingmen! Small victories are still victories if you take the time to appreciate them and when it comes to people, there’s no such thing as too much appreciation and applause.

It’s not always the time for grandeur and luxury. Sometimes success means spending the night laughing with a girlfriend in a bar you wore your new shoes to, and going home alone only to wake up and have four good orgasms in the shower, alone.

Success must be appreciated for what it is, zero. It’s that middle point where things aren’t extremely anything, not bad and not good. Success can be measured, and I think it should, as neutral. Where you want and need for nothing… because you’re satisfied.

And satisfaction is always the goal here at EBINOTTI!

When contentment and satisfaction become your daily mantras you’ll find pleasing and satisfying others to be an effortless and thrilling side effect. And nothing makes someone want to satisfy you more than feeling satisfied by you. People want to give back what you’ve so generously given them, you become an inspiration and wingman in there lives as well! It really is a beautiful thing.

So be there for people, show up and take the time to really listen, to try to understand, and when your time comes to share, to explain and to ask, you’ll find yourself easily pleased by others because you’ve set the tone as to how you want to be treated and how you expect to feel.

People remember the feelings they had when they were with you, not the things you said or sadly, even the shoes you wore. But trust me, they’ll never forget the way you felt when you wore them! So get out there and be a great wingman, and give thanks for those who helped you along your path to great success, sexual and otherwise!

Xo,
E

 

 

Rules of Running A Roster: Rule #7…

Check your emotions  …at the door.

You hear me? …at the door. No, I’m being serious. This is not a game of emotions. If it were then it wouldn’t be a fuckin Roster. It’d be someone you want to be exclusive with, or were at least considering it. Which means you should re-evaluate your objectives, your priorities, and your desires to find better clarity. And this goes back to Rule #1: Honesty. You have to be honest with yourself first, and if you’re catching feelings for someone you should think seriously about how much you care for them, and if you come to the conclusion that it’s more than just sex and friendship, if you really want them for your own, if you want to grow and build with them, then make the moves to see if it’s something they want as well. And still, you have to check your emotions at the door. Here’s the simple reason why:

You got into this with an understanding at the very least, and an agreement at the most of simple, no strings attached sex. So if you want to change that understanding because it’s evolved for you, you have to be honest and upfront about that. This isn’t one of those, ‘oh we don’t have to talk about it’ things, that’s child’s play. How many times do I have to tell you to Step Your Game Up?! You can’t just start acting differently and hope everything works out, then you’re emotionally vulnerable to them reacting apart from how you expect them to react. Cut the shit and check your emotions at the door. Have enough respect for them to sit down and talk to them as a fellow adult about what you want.

If you don’t want it to get awkward as you try and maneuver your way into a guy’s life, try just telling him straight up that you want more, or whatever you want. Just ask for it! Best case scenario, he says yes and you find out if it’s what you really want. Worst case scenario, he says no and then really all you have to do is make the decision if you want him like you have him, or if you can’t be with him at all anymore because it causes you emotional hardship. Again, do you see how you maintain control of your emotions at all times and the most crucial thing is to keep the power in fulfilling your own happiness?

This isn’t rocket science guys, and it isn’t the kind of game where you can give up the control of your emotions to someone. Like I hinted before, if it is that kind of game then you’re playing with your potential King, tread carefully… and we’ll be getting to that soon enough in the Conclusion of The Rules Pt.1 & Pt.2, where I’m gunna break down the concepts of running a roster on a psychological level, the why’s behind it and how to lay the rules out so they fit to your particular set of desires. I’ll be outsourcing and talking to some of my friends and acquaintances that I know play this game magnificently. I’ll be laying it bare for you guys to see what kind of light they can shed on the Rules. This can’t just be from my point of view or it won’t be achieving it’s maximum potential, so I’m bringing in some sly experts at running rosters. From fellow bartenders to 9-5ers who never followed the American Dream and remain free from dictatorship and live on their own terms. It’s gunna be a deliciously juicy couple of weeks in The Art Of Seduction guys, jus sayin. (Ya might wanna hit that follow button. I’ll wait here.)

Enough self promotion for now, let’s get back to it. I hate to make it seem so manipulative, but only because the word and the ideas behind this tactic hold such stigma, otherwise I’m all for it, but I suppose experience and history must do their part in ‘educating’ us. (PS. manipulation at it’s finest). In my mind it all comes down to integrity, where does the heart lie or the motive start, but this is how it is for life in general, not just your sex life… so I’ll leave that alone for now. Moving on. I’m super emotional today… can you guys tell? I feel feisty as fuck!

Rule #7: Check Your Emotions …at the door. It’s one of the hardest to maintain control of, forsure, the heart wants what it wants. And I won’t ever suggest that you ignore your emotions but rather understand that you have to be the one to protect your emotional needs, to care for them, and nurture them, because make no mistake… if you’re running a roster, you’re alone. And you’re not just single, you’re alone by choice. It’s almost like you’re making a statement when you fuck more than one guy at a time. You’re saying, “I choose to be alone.”

For me, at least it’s not the fear of commitment that keeps me running game, it’s got nothing to do with fear at all actually. It’s about pleasure if anything, but it hasn’t always been that way. Certainly had to do with fear of commitment and getting hurt in my younger years, but as soon as I became aware of my desires, as a whole, I understood my mind and my heart and my soul. I knew, I was always looking for Him… I just believe in that undying, unfaltering, unwavering, forever kinda love. And until I find it, I won’t commit. I don’t wanna lie to someone and tell them I love them and they’re my mate for life when I know it’s not true. So for me, there’s no point in being in a committed relationship if there’s no longevity involved. I’d rather be free and get those same comforts with whom ever I choose. But that’s just me, it doesn’t mean it’s going to be that way for you. The weirdest part for me, I still love occasionally, and even sometimes on a grand scale, but still there’s something missing… And I know, it’s better sometimes to love outside the box.

That’s me checking my emotions. When I love one of my boys, and I do love them sometimes… it’s because I respect them, and they’ve shown me loyalty, and I adore the way they treat me, and.. the list goes on. This differs for a lot of people, we all have our own version of love and affection and we definitely all have our own needs and desires. We connect when we find people that have similar desires and needs. That’s how we form bonds.

I’ve had some really incredible connections and I know I’ll have more. The only thing I can say about this rule, from my own experience is, be real about who you are, how you feel, and how you connect and/or love. It’s a feeling, and a very good one, if you are only willing to let it be. Sometimes it’s fleeting, and sometimes it lasts decades. But one thing is certain, if you never try to connect or you lie to yourself about how you feel, or you manipulate to get what you want without caring about the people you hurt, you will miss out on some pretty amazing moments in life, love, and sex.

These are my personal notes and experiences analyzed and researched and played with for over a decade. I really hope they’re valuable resources to help you get what you want, and everything you need to satisfy your sexual desires, and even bring your fantasies to life. No fear Ladies (& Gents, I suppose. Never really thought too much about male readers, but thank you for following along!) Remember: Be Unapologetic About Your Desires. (Rules for Dominating Life: Rule #1).

Comment below guys if you have any questions or thoughts about The Rules. I love to hear from you guys and hear all your stories and I’m happy to answer any questions about the ideas expressed here!

Until next time,
Go fuck yourself San Diego. <–means, a whale’s vagina (Incase you didn’t know, don’t worry, I got chu.)

E

I Believe In You

You have to believe in your own beauty. No one can make you feel beautiful forever unless you first feel beautiful in your own skin and right down to your soul.

First and foremost you have to face yourself. Lay out your moral code in all matters of your life. Every man needs a code. Start with the simple one and work your way deeper from there. Do you lie? Do you cheat? Do you steal? Again, nobody can do this for you. You have to know where you stand on all the important matters of your life, and why. Once you know why you’d never lie, or cheat, or steal you can move in any direction in your life knowing that you have a golden heart and strong mind, there’s no need to feel guilt or frustration because you know who you are and where you stand. Also, people around you will treat you the way you treat yourself, so watch how people naturally move in and out of your life when you start making deliberate choices and moral codes for yourself.

Next you have to look at yourself in the mirror and see all the beauty that lies before you. You have to know how you value yourself, what you love and what you maybe don’t love as much and be happy with yourself. If you’re not happy you have to change the things bothering you, for you, not for someone else. It’s your life, take responsibility for your own happiness. There is something beautiful about you, and you get to decide what role that will play in your life. Enjoy the freedoms that you have, not everyone has the gift of freedom on many levels.

Once all that’s in place, you can really start to have fun with your self awareness. You can make everything in your life a game. You can have fun moving through the normal or mundane moments of day to day life by loving what you do because it has purpose. It has an end game. Your love for yourself is healthy and has nothing to do with ego or conceit. Other’s are not involved in this game, this is a game you play all alone. You will watch and see how it changes your life where others are involved for when you love yourself on a grand scale you attract people and circumstances in your life to support the feeling you hold inside.

When you love yourself truly and wholly, you know that your dreams are only the foresight into your future, and if you really learn to play the game you become secure in the uncertainties of life. You know that you are going to receive gifts that you couldn’t even imagine, and that life is only what you make of it because you’ve felt the increble power that you hold. No one has to feel it or believe it because you’ve felt it and you believe it, and once you’ve done this you will never look back. You will simply live with your candle burning quietly in the window waiting for anyone who seeks the path you have walked. And you’ll be willing to help them in their journey to the joy and happiness that you feel. You will find companions, those who seek the same experiences in life as you do, and together you will build and create extraordinary things that can and will be remembered by the histories. You’ve made it great so far, why not reach higher, further? Dream bigger. Live bigger. Be bigger.

It’s 2015 and it’s the Year of the Beast. You are that beast, and anything you can imagine, you can have. You must always start with the why. Why do you want it, why is it important to you? How are you going to use that to make the world better, how are they going to help the people you can reach?

Your gratitude and undying belief in self will keep you soaring high about the mediocrity of the rat race of people trapped in fear, and like I said before, when they are ready to break the shackles and live free you will be there with open heart and open mind to guide or help however you can, because you’ve been through it. You know how it feels to believe in things when everyone around you thinks you’re crazy or stupid.

Let them believe what they will, it’s their freedom, and how they choose to use it is their karma with their own consequences. Know where you stand, and let the people around you watch as you pick up speed, as you vibrate on new levels, as you create your empire and build things no one thought possible. You are your only limit… there is no key to the universe, but someone left the door open…

E

Weekend Vibes: Never fucking settle!

My secret to staying sexy and powerful today has a few different levels to it and they all kind of fit together in the satisfaction of my physical desires.

It’s no secret that I love to fuck. Ladies, as much as I’ll preach over the months to come that you should live and fulfill your sexual desires and all your fantasies and have as much sex as you want, let me make this point very clear… NEVER settle for less than you deserve, and you deserve it all baby. Don’t let a guy disrespect you and treat you like shit just cuz he fucks you like a God and makes you squirt… or gives you orgasms that allow you to fully grasp the big bang theory.

You have to know your self worth and never be willing to settle for less than everything you desire, which is what you deserve! Never settle.

Now, I realize how difficult this is to live by, trust me, I do. Which is why theToyChest, also knows as thePleasureChest, is a crucial part of my existence, and plays a significant role in my over all balance of energy and happiness on a day to day basis. I’m not even going to remotely try and play down how important my vibrator is to me. And that’s only one amongst many toys I just gotta’ have.

Ok, when you’re building a roster, or more basically put, when you’re considering sleeping with a guy, you have to set your standards (high). You have to know what you’re willing to give to get what you want. By now you should know exactly what you want out of any physical relationships you have. Decide what you’re willing to give, because I promise you, he will take as much as he gives. It’s in a man’s nature to take from you and if you’re not the love of his life, most guys won’t provide much. DON’T lower your standards.

Let me give you an example. I have a guy that is incredible in bed.Great stamina, comes every time I call him… we have a super simple casual sex relationship that’s gone on for years. We take from each other in the same way we give to each other, we fuck and it’s as simple as that. When he calls, I come just the same. There’s not a huge sacrafice from either of us because we both want the same things fundamentally. I have another guy who fucks like a GOD, I mean, just blows my mind the second he puts his hands on me. He’s not so demanding of my time as, let’s call the first one “theJock”, but he’s very demanding of, shall we say, how I carry myself in public. HA! He’s a complete drama queen. We used to work in the same spot, so if he saw me touching another guy or even if he was just having a bad fuckin day and saw me hug a friend that was male, he’d snap and say I was fucking him, blah blah. Stomping around like a woman, that kinda shit. Very unpredictable in his outrage. I mean, I’m territorial sure, but this guy was just over the top in his ‘suspicions’ (aka insecurities). And for any guys who are reading out there, let me just say, if you fuck half as good as this guys does, you have nothing to be insecure about. I never really understood that part of him, but fuck it, that’s half the reason he’s un-dateable in the first place, he’s fuckin mental. But could I ever stop fucking him? No way. He’s a gem and an ace in the hole if you need a solid lay. We can call him, “theSexGod.” If you’ve never had one of these guys, get out there more. These types are usually fuckin pricks but they can play the game well if you stay firm to your rules. You’re both looking for the same thing, sex, he just, 99.9% of the time, won’t want you fucking other guys. Stand your ground, he’ll get over it.

See, with theSexGod I’m willing to keep him in check by ‘being good’ when we’re in the same room together to continue getting what I want, where as with ‘theJock’, not a fuckin chance I’d put up with that kind of behaviour. If he snapped on me, or I had to spend 3 hours on a Saturday night explaining ‘he’s just a friend’ I’d drop his ass until he stopped acting like a little girl. And then the vengeance I would take out on him when he came crawling back to me again would be vicious and needing of a safe word 100%.

This game or lifestyle or whatever you wanna call it is not as hard as we make it out to be… I’ve been weak, and I’ve been disappointed, but this is the #YearOfTheBeast !!! No more fuckin around, Ladies. Demand what you want, and I promise, you’ll get it. They always said, ‘She who has the cookie has the power,’ yes?

Realistically, it’s much easier to say no to a guy that every fibre of your being wants to fuck if you have theToyChest at home and you can easily get off and tame some of your sexual energy. You’re not always going to have someone worth it to call, and it’s gunna suck, cuz sometimes when you’re in these kinds of relationships people cross lines. And sometimes you know, at least this time, you have to say no and show them it may be a game, but they’re about to learn theRules. That being said, not all guys that fuck up deserve to be cut off. We all make mistakes but they certainly need to know that you won’t put up with nonsense. It’s your standards system, take control of it.

It’s simple really, I don’t have a lot of rules, but break them and their will be consequences. Now I wish I could say that I’m so bad ass and in control of my emotions that it would always be easy to practise what I preach, but since I’m only human and probably comparative to a male in my animalistic nature and self control, that would be a lie… hence the need for my favourite toy, my vibrator. It’s my favourite way to relax on my own. It’s a great prequel to stretching and yoga. Morning, noon, night… anytime, all the time. My lifeline. If you don’t have one… get one.

Which reminds me, I’ll be doing a review of my favourite sex toys and why you get what you pay for, shortly. Keep an eye out for that set of posts, there’s going to be some great links and juicy information that you won’t want to miss out on.
Come play.

E